Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
