He is such a slut. More and more my type.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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