Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
What a dumb baby whore.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
