We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
