A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
he just fucked me for my cheese..
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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