you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize