...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Im part way to drunk.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
