My brain says no but my pants say off.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Randomize
