Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
We're using joints as your birthday candles
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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