Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize