True but thats because hes a fetus.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
