she was so not down for the gang bang
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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