I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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