Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Randomize
