He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize