Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
