I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
