Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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