Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
