Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I enjoy the company of your penis
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
