matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize