Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
