I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
