Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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