just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
