that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
