best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
