wake up i wanna do it froggy style
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
The power of my boobs compel you
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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