They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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