I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
operation harelip BJ is a go
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
that is very illegal...i love you.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
