69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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