But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
