we're blogging at a bar
im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
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