I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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