there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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