so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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