last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
