I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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