I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
How's work?
Spinning.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
