did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
