You're completely useless in the revolution.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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