and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Terrible idea I love it
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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