Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
