Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
