WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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