just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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