i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize