Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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