Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
