Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Terrible idea I love it
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
